Friday, November 24, 2006
my retarded way of life ♥
super cold 2dae sia...crawl out frm e bed wif no blanket duno hu e stupid F*k cum in2 my rm n took it away n wash...[CANT U SEE ITZ RAINING OUTSIDE]....2dae iz e 3th dae of smoke free seem v triring sleepy illusion flu cough ani everytink nice mixing them in2 a sentence cal beter go n die...whahahahahaha...si bei jialat whole body ache-ing all way dwn no part iz fully relex...i duno if dae 3 like tt liao den 1 mth ltr u may see mi in hospital liao v soon...whahahahahah...kk continue wif my SRO...do nt disturb tis whole week...
*cheerz 2 matchbox
Thursday, November 23, 2006
my retarded way of life ♥
Finally manage 2 understand wad i m realy tinkin rite nw..e feeling iz so childish n using 1 side of my useless brain cell...i decided 2 chill myself 4 e time being 1 way 2 start was 2 STOP SMOKING!!!!!!!!! wahhahaha i tink all family member will start gifing mi pocket money liao...
DAY 1..4 e last 34hrs i haven even touch 1 crigg butt which i feel i v proud of myself whaahhaahha all e f*kers in my ship keep on using e PHYSCO-ing method but i still tink tt ther iz a ned 2 reslove my living rite nw...i dun wish 2 look back when i m 30 yrs old still smoking on e streets wif all e uncle if times r realy bad den start begging ppl 4 crigg...
Manage 2 survive e training at sea 2dae iz realy F*KING CCB KNN NBCB super ultimate HOT under e F*KING sun...every1 iz burning inside feel liao wan 2 ks n faint infront of CO den go inside e cozy cabin n slep..i duno my CO iz still human anot i tink i will ask a specilist 2 check on him on such a hot afternoon leaving frm hm so many hundreds km away doin training!!!!!!His mind muz had tink of getting e [best ship cup] in2 his own hand..wearing a fireman suit n go dwn e engine rm = tk a suana in a relex centre iz the same iz f*kin hot n heavy carring an oxygen tank runing around n FELL DOWN n e person still sae he iz ok [nt u IRWAN!!!]iz a super funny i tink ttz e tink which helps 2 cool us dwn wif RAJ all e lame jks lah n e f*ker water boy edwin i noe u wana ord oready but dun ned so fast clear leave plz no edwin = no water...v tiring dae lah 130pm reach base den 320 den can leave iz f*kin sian if can master teleport beter...kk goin peter shop nw
[ANI1 WANS 2 BUY FISH OR FEEDER BLK85 MARKET BEDOK NORTH V CHEAP 1] or msg mi oso can wad fish oso gt....gt free adversiting 4 MR PETER....
*CHEERZ 2 all bro...
*Smurf decided 2 switch frm henieken 2 tiger if out of ice lemon tea...
Wednesday, November 22, 2006
my retarded way of life ♥
1hr 4 mi goin 2 wrkk liao still unable 2 slep...i tink i had done alot of tinks wrg nw which make a great difference 4 every1...i really regret 4 wad i had did which should'nt had been done in e 1st place...2dae playin e billard oso nt myself i feel realy ps n i cant even had e face to tok 2 him straight in him even though he still being his ownself...i realy had change alot i m nt myself animore ttz wad peter told mi...i cant tink 4 myself animore do hw many time researching oso no use 4 mi..i m nt e person hu will change 4 my fren but wad i tok 2 peter below my blk i finally realise tt i had being stupid all tis while...i dun like 2 listen 2 beter advice animore i onli like ppl 2 change 2 my point of view n making use of them frm e time i had change...wtf wif mi rite nw oso duno i onli left wif my tis 4fren of mine n i m drifting further away frm them which i did'nt even start 2 realise until nw...i oso duno wad e f*k i m doin all is while playing my F*kin computer game...i m nt tt STEADY person which they sae i use 2 be...frm e start wher i had tis com itz e time our prob realy started if nt 4 my F*kin brain n my F*kin com all e tinks would nv even happen...lies after lies i had been tellin them which until 2dae means SO MUCH 2 them which i tink their tolerence iz at e max...
i realy duno wad realy happen 2 mi i 4get e slience promise our bro's had given frm e start i tink tt i m e 1 breakin them nw..even though they nv shown on their face 2dae but i still can feel e difference n e tone they tok 2 mi 2dae even they act as normal....i duno if i can still face them ltr ut i noe tt sumtink realy muz be done asap..n i hope my choice had make e route back 2 normal..8 long yrs wif tis fren can realy replace anitink coz they realy helped mi tru tis 21yrs...mistake after mistake i oso duno hw long it will still carry on but juz walk 1 step at a time iz a onli tink i can do nw...
i had been finding all e excuse 2 challenge all their qn which i tink back i m realy avoiding all ans..i duno if i can change myself i m totally blank by wad peter told mi..he iz e glue which stick us up in our 5fren n every1 iz spiltin 1 by 1..i noe sumtink i had done may nt be wrg but i realy nv tot of wad others might feel which iz e worse point..i had known them so well i cant still 4get at it i oso duno WTF i m doin n typing all tis..i feel so change in personailty i m nt i m should be...tink tru wad i did iz F*KIN stupid action.............................................
*f*k my f*kin com
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
my retarded way of life ♥
Nw iz 0031 for e last 2 hrs i had been tokin 2 peter below my blog..he ask mi wad i wan in my future,e most shocking tink tt cum out frm his mouth iz tt IN OUR SO MANY FREN U R E MOST USELESS N NO FUTURE TINKIN PERSON....i oso speechless duno wad i can sae 2 him coz itz realy v true..i oways been tinkin of goin out n slack @ hm playing my game n nv tink of anitink of wadz goin 2 happen 2 mi after my job...he even ask mi whether b4 i slep gt tink of anitink anot...sad but realy true i m a pointless person living in tis house i haf no sense of direction of where i goin 2 go n wad i m goin 2 do....
i can haf a stable job but wadz the point do i realy wana e a slave 2 e country get afew thousand in a month????? n live happily ever after????
ttz equal 2 a simple man in singapore..we both like to smoke we like 2 bet we like 2 club where gt enuff money 2 save???he told mi tt in singapore ppl do realy look dwn on ppl hu had no money..when u had no money where u get all the galz u wan they wun pop out on no where..he compare mi wif ROGER hu iz a company umbralla boss SON..he can get wad he wan but we little prawn ned 2 achieve much more inorder 2 get half of wad he realy gets...
my another fren KENNY using his father 300k to go u.s study the U until 2dae i den noe tt 30k iz realy means tt much 2 mi until peter told mi i could study 10times in S.I.M geting a degree...the prob cums between whether i m going 2 study n go ahead or standing still n move on slowly wher every1 iz eating the big cheese..
i even fail my ORAL test 2dae on a stupid steersman-ship which i nv even put in much effort in reading a single page den hw m i going 2 study in the S.I.M which peter recommand mi 2 go but wad will i get if i go on studying wif my limited brain cell wrkin...getting the 30k iz easy but will i manage it well in studying which iz goin tru my brain spinning...maybe ttz wad ppl sae as u grow u haf more prob cuming to u which u cant even SIAM away...no1 will teach u hw the road to success but u onli can figure it by urself i still had 7th mth wrkin it out but itz still 2 short 4 mi...i realy dun understand y i dun listen 2 ppl when they r trying v hard 2 makes tinks rite 4 mi...the best sentence cuming out frm his BLOODY mouth"wadz the point of tinkin wad u had in the past iz wad u wan 2 get in the present"if ani1 of u reading my blog i recommand u a bk call WHO MOVE MY CHEESE he told mi the story den i relise that i was tt stupid little man waiting 4 the cheese to come back to mi...u can look back to the PAST but u cant see the FUTURE unless wad u achieve in the PRESENT..u can nw see notink infront of u but when u climb higher u can had a greater view....i dun understand hw he bcome so SMART oso duno hw 2 describe him maybe his fish shop make him turn in2 a beter man liao....wad he sae iz true,wad u do every little tink affect ur little tinkin in life...
@2 e continue tml
*cheerz BrOz
